Saturday, September 09, 2006

You should have called it a night...

How do you know if you've partied too much...if you should have called it a night?!

Read on, my friends!

1. I have absolutely no idea where my bag is

2. I believe that dancing with my arms overhead and wiggling my bootay while yelling WOO-HOO is truly the sexiest dance move around

3. I've suddenly decided I want to kick someone's ass and honestly believe I could do it too (bitch...i ain't playin...)

4. In my last trip to pee I realize I now look more like a homeless hooker than the goddess I was just four hours ago

5. I drop my 3:00AM snack on the floor (which I'm eating even though I'm not the least bit hungry), pick it up and carry on eating it

6. I start crying and telling everyone i see that I love them soooooo much

7. There are less than three hours before I'm due to start work or enter the classroom

8. I can't seem to stop making phone calls to people I haven't talked to in years

9. The man/woman I'm flirting with used to be my biology teacher

10. The urge to take off articles of clothing, stand on a table and sing or dance becomes strangely overwhelming

11. My eyes just don't seem to want to stay open on their own so I keep them half closed and think it looks exotically sexy

12. I've suddenly taken up smoking and become really good at it

13. I yell at the bartender, who (I think) cheated me by giving me just cranberry juice, but that's just because I can no longer taste the vodka

14. I think I'm in bed, but my pillow feels strangely like the bathroom floor

15. I start every conversation with a booming, "DON'T take this the WRONG WAY but..."

16. I fail to notice that the toilet lid's down when I sit on it

17. My hugs begin to resemble wrestling take-down moves

18. Boys/girls you would never be attracted to seem to look amazingly hot...and you might end up kissing one or two or six of them

19. I begin leaving the buttons open on my button fly pants to cut down on the time I'm in the bathroom and away from my drink

20. I take my shoes off because I believe it's their fault that I'm having problems walking straight

1 comment:

Carrie said...

Let's see the ones that apply to yours truly...
I always keep tabs on my purse, it never leaves my side, 2, 3, 4, 5, I tell people I love them, but sans tears, 7 rarely, 10, 11, 12, 14- I have legit fallen asleep with my head on a public toilet seat, 16 and 18